Day 404: The Borg

I instituted a new policy in the Parrots classroom today (well, besides no Hopping Games in gym class after Veggie Curry days at school) and I'm hoping this one sticks. The speaking of Korean has been running rampant in the classroom since the beginning of the school year and I've been feeling helpless in stopping it. You tell one kid "No Speaking Korean!" and turn around to hear another half dozen of them engaged in a conversation in Hangeul. It's like this all day and it feels like trying to stop the tide coming in with a pail and shovel. You have no idea how frustrating this feels! POLY is an "English-only" school and this is a very serious rule. And it's up to us teachers to break this in right from the start with the Preschoolers. No leniancy allowed.

Well this new policy of mine involves writing all the kids' names up on the board and whenever one of them speaks Korean they get a 'tick' put under their name. If they get up to three they don't get a sticker that day (a big deal) and for every time after that they actually get a sticker *removed* from their precious sticker chart. You can't imagine how traumatizing it is for them to lose a sticker! Also, to couple that with some positive reinforcement, all kids who don't have any ticks under their name actually get two stickers that day. Wow!

Well in just two days of this it made an immediate effect. The speaking of Korean came to a screeching halt. On Day 1 of this only two kids got up to three ticks, and on Day 2 not one of them did. I had such a quiet peaceful classroom it was so wonderful! Not only are they speaking English more now, but they're even policing each other on it. It's been great!

As successful as it's been so far I'm not breaking out the champagne quite yet. Ask me in a few weeks and we'll see then. You see, Korean children are like The Borg. Often you'll introduce a new rule or policy or means of enforcement and it'll totally be effective at first, but then it's like they adapt and assimilate your new rule and eventually become immune to it. They just stop caring about that particular rule and could really just give a shit about something that used to be so successful. You try again with more incentives and punishments and yet they keep on adapting and assimilating. Resistance is futile?

I'm determined to keep my kids from getting immune to this new policy. It's too important and I'm tackling it head on as a personal challenge. I'm not gonna let The Collective Hive beat me out this time! ;-)

Day 403: Projectile

So there we were in gym class today, me and the 12 Parrots, just having a gay old time hoppin' along. We had just finished Hopping Races and were now engaged in their most favourite of all games - What Time Is It Mr. Wolf? (or affectionately known as just "Wolf Game" by my kids) I was standing against one wall and the kids were about three quarters of the way across the gym when all of a sudden, absolutely without warning, completely from nowhere, totally unexpectedly...

...Roy threw up!

And I'm not just talking your basic five-year old blowing chunks deal. I'm talking about full-fledged, all-out, hard-core, just givin' 'er, aiming for a gold in the Puking Olympics, PROJECTILE VOMIT. I've never seen projectile vomit before, at least never like this.

Honestly, it literally *rocketed* out of his mouth, nearly breaking the speed of sound barrier, and spewed *at least* seven feet across the room. The vomit's hues were a unique combination of daffodil yellow, mandarin orange, and fresh lawn-cuttings green and didn't just come out in one stream, but was rather like a high-powered backyard sprinkler - aimed in one direction but broken up into several distinct individual spurts. Like a trail of wreckage left behind by a crashing jetliner plowing through an Iowa corn field, it lay spread across the gym mats and even a little on the wall. Mere inches from where I was standing (phew, that was a close call!)

And all of this from a boy who's so small that when standing doesn't even reach half way up my thigh. I really don't understand the practical physics of how that is even possible!

I just about lost it and almost began tossin' my own cookies. It was all I had to usher him *quickly* to the bathroom and not ralph myself all over the hall. THANK GOD (for me) it's the Korean teachers who handle this sorta stuff so I ran to get Sonya and she had the lovely duty of clean-up duty. Apparently she almost threw up herself while cleaning up Roy's saucy post-curry-lunch concoction. Poor girl.

And that was the end of Tuesday's gym class. Just like that.

Day 402: Beijing-Bound

So it's official. My airline confirmation has been made. There is now a reserved ticket, in my name, for a one-way trip from Seoul to Beijing.

ONE-WAY!!! OMG!!!

Booking this ticket seriously brought it home for me today. It's real. It's gonna happen. Project Wanderlust has been put in motion. I've got it booked and all I gotta do now is transfer my money over and it's a done deal. I've taken the plunge, I've set the wheels in motion, it's all falling into place.

So, on Saturday, July 9th at 1:40pm Asiana Airlines Flight #333 will be transporting me on the one hour and forty-five minutes flight from Korea to China. I can't imagine how it's gonna feel to be on that airplane. Wow!

Day 401: Sinchon

I slept in waaaay longer today than I had planned, and no surprise there given what I was up to last night. ;-) Although Pauline and I finally stirred around 1 in the afternoon, we didn't actually get showered and dressed until after 3pm. We spent half the afternoon just hanging out in bed chatting about all sorts of things. Lazy asses!!!

By the time we were all cleaned up and ready to head out into the world, it was nearly 4pm. I had the biggest craving you can possibly imagine for a Subway sandwich (it has been several months since I've had one) and wasn't gonna rest until I got my hands on one. Pauline lives in Hongdae which is right next to Sinchon, where we had heard rumours of a Subway there. With a little direction from Paul we were able to find it, and I was soooo happy to chow down on a massive foot long. Mmmm.... The power of food really is quite the motivating factor for me in this world!

Pauline and I wandered around for a bit before parking ourselves at Starbucks for the rest of the afternoon. Sinchon probably is the coolest part of Seoul and really is my favourite neighbourhood to hang out in. Sinchon is one of the hippest and most fashionable districts in the city. And also as a result one of the busiest. At least three *major* universities are nearby and so its the student population that dictates the vibes of Sinchon. Everyone is young and relaxed and in good spirits and dressed all-so-funkily and just out to have fun with their friends. It's great because it's also quite a mixed neighbourhood of both locals and foreigners, but it's not the sleazy obnoxious white trash military foreigners, but rather the cool English Teachers (the ones cool enough to know about Sinchon, the trashy teachers also hang out in Itaewon with all the GI's) as well as plenty of exchange students studying at the nearby universities. As a foreigner you can actually walk down the street and not get gawked at by the locals, and aren't repulsed by the whities that you do run into. Sinchon is full of eclectic little stores, hole-in-the-wall record stores, kitschy clothing and shoe vendors, a thousand eateries including all the major chains, the requisite Starbucks, a plethora of bars and nightclubs (incl. My Institution, The Bar) and also Korea's one and only Krispy Kreme. Seriously, what more could you want in a neighbourhood? I love that place!

Pauline and I stayed for a few hours talking about travel in Vietnam and then it was time to part ways. I took a bus to LaFesta and met up with Katie, Jessica, and Addie. We went to a DVD bang and saw an *AMAZING* movie called The Motorcycle Diaries. It was awesome!!! Seriously, the best film I've seen in possibly years, and you really do need to see this movie! A great end to a truly great weekend! ;-)

Day 400: You Know What They Say About Guys With Big Feet...

Today was a busy, busy day! But also a really fun, action-packed one too!

Addie and I rolled into the city today to go and have some brunch, but not before making a pit stop at the foreign foods store here in Ilsan. I had never been but had heard about it from coworkers, and man was it ever awesome! I went their with a specific mission of buying some dill pickles for my buddy Luke who I would be meeting up with later (he has a penchant for dills, and can't find any in Chungju where he lives) but it was hard not to get distracted by all the goodies there. I made a serious mental note to return here soon to stock up my own cupboard with foreign treats, but didn't leave without picking up a Toblerone chocolate bar for myself and some Mrs.Butterworth syrup for Michael. Mmmm....Mrs.Butterworth....

Addie and I had brunch at the Rocky Mountain Tavern in Itaewon and it was great. They only have one thing on their breakfast menu but it kicks major ass. Eggs, bacon (of course I didn't eat any!), hashbrowns, toast, and coffee. It's like morning sex on a plate covered in ketchup! YUM! After brunch we went to Starbucks to grab a coffee and meet up with Luke. We also ran into Cora, who I haven't seen in forever and a day, so the four of us spent some time chatting away before hitting Itaewon to do some shopping. We went to the Thai/Turkish/Indian foreign food store there, made a pit stop at What The Book, and then went on to go and try and find some shoes for me.

I'm in the market for a shoe that's a hybrid between a hiker and a running shoe for my trip. Something that's light and comfortable and breathable so I can walk around Bangkok and Jakarta and Shanghai all day and not get weighed down, yet also traipse through the jungles of Vietnam or scamper up the slopes of Indonesian volcanoes and have the support needed so I don't break my ankle. Sounds like a tall order, but these shoes *are* out there. Luke did some research and there's plenty of companies out there that make these really cool shoes.

Now comes the problem, which has unfortunately become all-too familiar for me here in Korea. I can find shoes I like, just none that fit me. Now at a size 12 I've got fairly large feet (*wink wink*) but I mean, come on, it's not like they're monster ginormous feet or anything like that! There are other foreigners out there with bigger feet than mine. So how the hell are we supposed to buy shoes? Well "not anywhere in Korea" is perhaps the answer. We went to tons of stores, including Nike, Adidas, New Balance, NorthFace, and Columbia, and didn't have any luck at any of the stores. Argh!

I really do need these shoes!!! How the hell am I gonna find some? We found the style that we needed at several of the stores, but none in the size I wear. Apparently no one in Korea wears shoes bigger than size 10.5? *sigh* I really don't know what to do, cause I've got weird feet and don't often find shoes that fit comfortably right off the bat, otherwise I'd just order some online. I don't have a whole lot of options though...if the shoe stores in foreigner-oriented Itaewon don't carry my size, no one in Korea will!

After our failed attempt at shoe acquisition, we made a stop at Yongsan and then went off to meet up with Katie and Jessica for dinner. The two girls were nearly an hour late for dinner, but we still had an amazing meal at this Indian restaurant in Dondaemun that none of us had ever been to. It was incredible! Great menu, fair prices, and very delicious food! God, I love Indian food!! We're definitely gonna come back here sometime.

After dinner we went to a nearby bar for a drink, and then split up. The girls went home to Ilsan, Luke went back to Chungju, and then Michael and I made our way to Sincheon. We went to my favourite place to bathe myself in gin 'n tonic - The Bar - to meet up with Pauline, Y-S, and Paul. The five of us had a great night as always (I've never had a bad night there!) and stayed out pretty late. They even played four of the five songs that I requested!! (Love Shack, Beat It, She Bop, and Hey Ya!) I mean it just doesn't get any better than that! Beaucoup de beverages later Michael and Y-S headed off for another bar and I went and crashed at Pauline's. Now that she lives just around the corner I really don't have to travel far to find a place to spend the night after a night out on the town! Right on!

Day 399: First Time Out

Today was my first Field Trip Day with The Parrots: Season 2 and I was kinda nervous about it. Taking 12 Preschoolers out into the real world and outside the safety of the classroom is always kinda nerve-racking. And with this being our first time all out together, who knows how they're gonna react when those kids get out into the wild open lands of Ilsan with nothing but the polluted wind in their hair and a yellow and black POLY backpack on their backs!

Overall it actually went quite well. The field trip was out in Hwajeong to see a play - in Korean. Seems kinda weird that we're an *English* school and we're taking the kids to see a *Korean* play but hey it's a morning outside of work so I'm not going to complain. The theatre was in the top floor of a giant department store and was a Korean remake of the book/movie The Little Princess. I'm not familiar with this story but from what my coworkers said, (who have all seen the movie,) it was pretty bad. The kids loved it anyways, despite how budget and lame it appeared to us. It was actually quite cute to see some of them yelling out at the bad guys on the stage and getting all excited whenever there was a little bit of drama.

We made it back to POLY safe and sound, all 12 of the little rugrats accounted for. They were starved and exhausted by the time we made it back to school, and then it was time to get them ready for home. Nice!

Day 398: Back Again

So the months really do fly on by...

Another semester of school has ended, and so Eric is back in town for a few weeks to hang out and visit with his friends and family. Wow, wasn't it just last week that he was home for the holidays on another school break? Well I guess that was December, and here we are in late March already. He's here for about three weeks and both Michael and I are looking forward to spending time with him before he disappears back to London again.

Addie and I went to meet up with the two boys and Pauline at LaFesta after work. We went to TGI Friday's for dinner and then out for drinks later. Today is St. Patrick's Day so we met up with a bunch of the gang from work for some drinks at Rosenbrau - a 'German' right here in LaFesta. It was cool to sit and have some drinks with the five of us, plus Kara, Chris, Tim, Peter, Jeremy, Dana, and Julie. I was a good boy and didn't stay too late. Well with gin 'n tonics at 7000 Won a piece there was no way I was going to start stacking those up. And it's a school night. And we all know what happens when Scotty stays out late on a school night. It ain't pretty. That one time back in August was one time too many, thank you very much.

Day 397: Colin

So my earlier suspicions have proven to be true. Every class has at least one 'Problem Child', and I've discovered mine. And in the Parrots class that's Colin, just as I had predicted.

He's not quite on the scale like Screaming Eugene or Angry Hyper Hae Keun was last year, but he's certainly challenging enough. Besides having serious issues with authority (which, by the way, how is that even possible at this age? He's only five and already wants to fight 'the man' - ie: ME - and try and buck the system with that relentlessly eternal question we all hate to hear in million-time successions, - "why") but he's an instigator with the other children. Any and all spats that arise in class *always* have Colin as one of the two parties involved.

His favourite target is Danny, who in theory couldn't be a more perfect bullseye for him to go after because Danny enjoys reporting every single little miniscule mishap to his anal-rententive and obsessive-coddler mother. Poor Sonya has been buried a barrage of phone calls from Danny's parents who are convinced that Colin is out to kill their son. Not that Colin is an a heavenly angel, and I certainly don't condone this behaviour and in fact feel very frustrated by it, but come on, this is bound to happen with kids. You gotta expect it a little and have some patience while kids learn how to form more friendly relationships at school. And Danny isn't exactly innocent either - he seems almost as magnetically drawn to pushing Colin as vice-versa.

So class time has become a balance of keeping the two boys relatively separated, dealing with the million and one little cries for help that inevitably arise - Scott Teacher to the rescue! - and maintaining peace and balance in ParrotLand, all while trying to teach twelve children their ABC's and how to write. And also all the while keeping up with Poly's sometimes (read: often) ridiculously fast-paced learning schedule cause "we're an intensive school", making sure the kids are still having fun cause hey they're still kids right?, and looking sharp, collected, and large-and-in-charge for the school directors. Phew!

Who knew that Preschool could have so many politics involved?

Day 396: Spring Is In The Air

Well it looks like winter has *finally* been broken! After what seemed a long and particularly dull and bitterly cold winter, it actually feels like it's starting to warm up here in Korea. There were only two snowfalls all winter long here in Ilsan and neither of them stayed on the ground for more than 24 hours. And when I say cold I guess it isn't all that bad. I mean cold here in Korea is not like cold back in Thunder Bay! (Maybe I've just been spoiled by all those years in balmy Vancouver?) It's just that during winter here everything is brown and grey and dead and ugly. The trees are bare, the hills are absent of colour or life, and living in a sea of highrise apartment towers you really only do see about three shades or tones - withering brown, putrid beige, and soulless grey. Jamiopso! (Korean for 'not fun!')

But not things are a-changing. The air is a bit warmer. I don't need mittens or a scarf when I walk to work. I don't need to have the heat cranked in my apartment everyday now. I can actually hear birds when I walk to work. And today for the first time I saw some buds on the trees. Yah!!! Spring, like every other season in Korea, usually arrives specifically on one day, bringing about an instant transformation and sudden and complete change. I remember last year just waking up one day in April and it was like the world here had just exploded in green overnight. Here's hoping for a repeat performance of that trick this year!

Day 395: Sex & The City

Tonight after work we decided to have a Sex & The City night. The other weekend Addie bought the last half of the Sixth Season and so a bunch of us from work decided to hang out and watch the antics of everyone's favourite frantic female foursome unfold.

Addie, Katie, Jessica, Kara, and I laughed our asses off and before we knew it we were four episodes in. Time flies when you're having fun! I haven't seen any of Season 5 or 6 so it was all new for me, but it's the kind of show that one can watch over and over and over again and never tire of it. Well, at least I never do. I mean come on! With eye candy for everyone left right and centre, guest stars like Mikhail Barishnokov (sp?) and Geri Halliwell, entire episodes devoted to why women need $450 shoes, and lines like "No man wants to fuck grandma's pussy!" (courtesy of Samantha - of course - after she discovers a grey hair...down there....) - and all of that in just four episodes - how can you *not* become addicted? It's wickedly smart, unabashedly crass, full-frontedly real and honest, and uproariously funny. I love it!

Day 395: Sex & The City

Tonight after work we decided to have a Sex & The City night. The other weekend Addie bought the last half of the Sixth Season and so a bunch of us from work decided to hang out and watch the antics of everyone's favourite frantic female foursome unfold.

Addie, Katie, Jessica, Kara, and I laughed our asses off and before we knew it we were four episodes in. Time flies when you're having fun! I haven't seen any of Season 5 or 6 so it was all new for me, but it's the kind of show that one can watch over and over and over again and never tire of it. Well, at least I never do. I mean come on! With eye candy for everyone left right and centre, guest stars like Mikhail Barishnokov (sp?) and Geri Halliwell, entire episodes devoted to why women need $450 shoes, and lines like "No man wants to fuck grandma's pussy!" (courtesy of Samantha - of course - after she discovers a grey hair...down there....) - and all of that in just four episodes - how can you *not* become addicted? It's wickedly smart, unabashedly crass, full-frontedly real and honest, and uproariously funny. I love it!

Day 394: Million Dollar Baby

Today was a whole lotta nothing. Hmmm...I wonder why that is? ;-)

Meghann and I went to Yongsan to watch a movie and let's just say that we weren't moving all that quickly to get there! It was more of a slow meander to the movie theatre than a b-line! We went and saw 'Million Dollar Baby' and it was an absolutely incredible movie! The acting was incredible, the story line emotional and entertaining, and it left you with such a feeling of "damn that was a great movie, so worth my 7000 Won!" It definitely won every Oscar it got. I've been seeing a lot of really exceptionally good movies lately - Ray, The Aviator, Finding Neverland, and now Million Dollar Baby.

After the movie I went and met up with Addie, Katie, Jessica, and Peter for some dinner at Ho Lee Chow at LaFesta (great American-Chinese food!) After dinner they went to go and see Million Dollar Baby, and I went home to relax. Back to work tomorrow, I better go to bed - I *really* need my energy for work these days...

Day 393: Blame The Wine!

So tonight was supposed to be a quiet night in, relaxing with friends and playing board games at Michael's. None of us felt like going to the bar, didn't really feel like staying out late, and just wanted to have a 'chill' night in for a change. Well, those plans were certainly shot to hell by the end of tonight! Haha!

Pauline, Angele, and Meghann came over to Michael's and we were all gonna just play Trivial Pursuit: Pop Culture and have a couple glasses of red wine. Well that ended up turning into a full-on night of debauchery, courtesy of six bottles of red wine and us five silly teenage twenty-somethings. Trivial Pursuit was soon taken over by drunken Cranium and we all know where that leads to! The vino just kept on pouring, as did the dirty jokes and stories, the dancing and falling down in fits of laughter, and hushed cigarettes and drunken acrobatics out in the hallway of Michael's apartment building. Runway model impersonations, tit-grabbing and comparison, breadjobs in the parking garage, we had it all, baybee!!

It must've been at least 4am by the time we ran out of wine and were starting to crash from our highly energy-intensive night of pure silliness and good ol' fashioned dirty drunken fun. God I love my friends!!!

Day 392: Gravitation

Hooray for Fridays! No longer is it that the weeks fly by nearly effortlessly with Friday upon your heels before you know it. This week crawled on by. It felt like ten working days instead of five. The new school year and The Parrots: Season 2 really is taking a beating on me these days! I'm so tired!!

Friday Night TV Night was much appreciated, and Michael came out to watch it with us. As soon as 10pm rolled around though we took off and fled for south of the river - to Bucheon. Yes, Bucheon, the neighbouring suburb to where I used to live back in my hell hole hagwan days. Ailish has moved into a new apartment (she's no longer living in Shihung) and was having a housewarming party tonight. Michael and I had a helluva time trying to find the place (foreigners only know how to give directions for transit-oriented journeys, not automobile-based ones!) but eventually did find it.

It turned out to be a pretty cool party actually. Not all that big or crazy, but I got to chat with some cool people and have some interesting conversations. The Canadians always seem to flock to each other it seems. Most English Teachers in Korea are Canadian, but at a party of mixed nationalities, the Canucks always seem to naturally gravitate towards each other to trade stories of small hometown boredom, escapes and escapades in university, and the million and one reasons why they fled their beloved country to come and teach here. Everybody's got a story, but it does all seem relatively familiar after a while. "I wanted to pay off my ginormous student loans." "I was bored and wanted to do something different with my life." "I couldn't find a job in my field." "I wanted to travel and see more of the world." "I love kimchi so much I just *had* to go and live in the kimchi heartland of the world." Hmmm....better scratch off that last one! ;-)

Michael and I stayed for a couple of hours and then went back to his place to sleep. House parties aren't all that common here in Korea (most people's apartments are just too small) and I was glad to go to one tonight. Good times!

Day 391: Scary Movie

Another Thursday night, another chill night just hanging out with friends. Katie's got her friend Jessica in town from Nebraska and they were off busy doing something, so it was just Addie and I tonight. We had some TGI Friday's for dinner, and then decided to go and do the DVD bang thing.

We decided to opt for a scary movie, as Katie doesn't like them and so we don't rent them when she's with us. We ended up choosing 'What Lies Beneath'. I hadn't seen it since the theatre in Chilliwack with my sister back in...god when was that movie? 1997? 1999? 2000? I really can't remember... Anyways I actually enjoyed it more this time around - it's an alright movie with some parts that really make you jump.

After the movie we went home and I made sure that no dead women were hiding in my bathtub. Oh yeah, that's right - I don't have one! Another potential supernatural threat taken care of by good ol' Korean bathroom standards. Yah! ;-)

Day 390: Project Wanderlust

wanderlust

noun : very strong or irresistible impulse to travel

synonyms: Wanderjahr, afoot and lighthearted, bumming, discursion, divagation, drifting, errantry, flitting, gadding, hoboism, itineracy, itinerancy, nomadism, peregrination, pererration, ramble, rambling, roam, roaming, rove, roving, straying, traipsing, vagabondage, vagabondia, vagabondism, vagrancy, wandering, wayfaring

The word 'wanderlust' actually comes from a German word meaning 'joy of walking', and it is a condition that I am seriously afflicted with. And therefore the perfect code name for the next phase of my life. Ladies and gentlemen, The S2H World Tour is proud to unveil today the next chapter in what may be the most amazing and wondrous and grandiose and illustrious and exquisite and awe-inspiring of all world events - Project Wanderlust.

Exactly four months from today will be the official launch date of Project Wanderlust. The countdown to July 9, 2005 has begun. And you better hold onto your butts, cause it's gonna be a long and wild ride.

Project Wanderlust is my dream trip come to life. It is a full half-year backpacking odyssey around East and Southeast Asia. In six months I will be travelling through nine - yes, count 'em - NINE (9) - countries, almost entirely by surface. My goal is to conduct as much of the travelling by bus, train, foot, ship, bicycle, river raft, pack mule, livestock-filled pickup truck as possible. I will only use planes when lack of surface infrastructure or time-shortages force me to do so.

Beginning in Beijing, Project Wanderlust will take me across Eastern China through Shanghai and Hong Kong, before a brief jump over to Taiwan to visit my friend Laura in Taipei and Ryan in Kaohsiung, before returning to the Asian mainland to traipse through Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, and Northern Thailand. After that I will be drawn further south into the jungles and along the beaches of Southern Thailand and Malaysia, before jumping across to Indonesia. I will then island-hop across Sumatra, Java, Bali, Lombok, Sumbawa and Flores as I explore this massive archipelago, until the time comes to answer the urban calls of big city Singapore. A few more weeks in Malaysia and Thailand exploring other coastlines, islands, lost paradies and oasises will take place before flying out and returning (very briefly) back to The Land Of The Morning Calm (aka: Korea), and then taking the big long flight on the big long mechanical bird back to the home continent. I will have my wonderful family, childhood friends, and frigid sub-Arctic weather to greet me as I return to Canada for the first time in two years to celebrate a very special Christmas. *Phew!*

The Great Wall of China. The skyscraper races-to-the-sky of Shanghai. The chaotic markets of Hong Kong. The casinos of Macau. The reuniting of old friends in Taiwan. The limestone karst terrain of Halong Bay in Vietnam. The war wounds of Ho Chi Minh City and Southern Vietnam. The majestic temples of Angkor Wat in Cambodia. The mysterious Plain of Jars in Laos. The jungle tribes and elephant treks of Northern Thailand. The sights and sounds and smells of Bangkok. The pristine beaches and dense jungles of Malaysia. The volcanoes and orangutans and komodo dragons of Indonesia. The electric nightlife of Singapore. All will be seen and touched and experienced.

It will be the experience of a lifetime, and soon enough it will be mine. There may be only four months left here in Korea, but World Tour really has just begun. Stay tuned and logged in for stories of adventure and peril and exploration and transformations. Follow along as I discover the world, and as the world discovers me.
All right here in Project Wanderlust, brought to you by The S2H World Tour. ;-)

Day 389: No English Days

Ugh. I hate Tuesdays and Thursdays. They're my 'No English Days.'

Because of my line-up of classes, I feel like no one I interact with that day speaks English. I teach Preschool in the morning, and they don't really speak English. (and plus I have computer and gym class on these days and they've been *rough*.) Then I teach Science to the Special 1's Level 4 and 5, which really are the bottom of the barrel. They're cute and sweet kids, but we're talking LOW English-speaking abilities, as in 'Subterranean Low'. Teaching them Science has been tough so far, as I've discovered that I really gotta gear it down for them (and when I mean 'teach' I really mean I'm actually just talking to the wall it seems.) And then I teach the lowest level kids of GT 4... Great kids, but we're talking really low as well.

Man, I really was spoiled last year with all the high level classes! Tuesday/Thursdays have been kicking my ass in the last two weeks. I guess it's time I kick it into high gear and kick it up a notch - or 475 notches, perhaps. This semester is really going to best my true teaching abilities.

So, when's my next vacation? ;-)

Day 388: Little Sponges

Children are amazing!

Their brains are totally like little sponges - they just soak up everything around them! I've been teaching my kids for less than a week now but it's unbelievable how much they've absorbed already. Their vocabulary is increasing by the day. I can literally see a difference in their understanding from one day to the next. They're picking up the key phrases, are slowly falling into our daily routine, and are becoming more confident and 'experimental' with their English skills. It really does blow me away.

Overall today was a pretty good day. I've got a fairly well-behaved bunch at the moment, and I really appreciate that. Korean is still running rampant in the classroom though, and I don't know how to put a stop to that. Trying to get the kids to not speak Korean is like standing on a beach when the tide's coming in and I'm trying to stop the water with just a pail and shovel. Not very effective! Our bosses keep telling us to be strict them, and don't worry too much cause it takes time. They're all improving though, some at faster paces than others.

Studies have shown that children between the ages of 1 and 4 have the most 'flexible' brain capacity for learning a new language. Every single baby born in the world can produce any sound produced in any language, but as soon as they start speaking they begin losing the physical ability to reproduce sounds not heard in their surroundings. The larynx immediately becomes 'imprinted' with the ability to make particular sounds, and the sooner you expose a child to foreign sounds, the easier they'll have with learning and pronunciation of foreign languages later on in life. It's fascinating! It sure makes me wish that I could pick up a language that quickly.

Day 387: All The Ingredients

Today was a relaxed, low-key, fun day out with friends, and contained all the ingredients needed for a perfect afternoon:

- a great group of friends (today was Michael, Angele, and Meghann)
- a delicious lunch (courtesy of 3 Alley Pub)
- a grande extra hot extra sweet caramel macchiatto (thanks to Starbucks)
- a visit to not one, but two book stores (WhatTheBook? and Kyobo)
- some fantastic television (avec The OC, thanks to Chris' computer)

Seriously, what more could I ask for in a day? And how lucky am I to have such a great life here in Korea! I definitely have a very comfortable lifestyle that I'm more than just a little used to. What a shame to give it all up in only four months...

Day 386: A Little Bit Of Culture

Luke came into the city today so I met up with him to hang out. And, as usual, with a visit from Luke I can always be sure of two things:

1) I'm gonna rack up a lot of miles on the subway
2) A visit to Yongsan Electronics Market can always be guaranteed

And today, those two rules rang true again! Haha!

We met at Dondaemun to do a little shoe shopping for him. It reminded me that I need new shoes myself, especially with all the trekking that I'm going to be doing come July... After that we went over to Yongsan and Luke bought some CD's and DVD's. By that time we had to get back on the subway again to go and meet up with Addie for dinner.

It was a long ride all the way to Jamsil Station over in SE Seoul, but it was well worth the ride. We actually had dinner at a Western restaurant that I had not eaten at yet - Chili's! And incidentally, it's also the only Chili's in Korea, and my first visit ever to one. Overall it was pretty good actually - varied menu and the pretty yummy food. Too bad it takes forever and a day to get over there!

After dinner we said goodbye to Luke and Addie and I headed on down to the Seoul Arts Centre. Tonight we had tickets to the opera! This was the first time I've done anything like this here in Korea and I wasn't sure what to expect, but it turned out to be a really fantastic evening. The opera hall was beautiful, and the show - La Boheme - was spectacular. All the singers were Korean but the show was in Italian, and they pulled it off marvellously. Addie and I had a great time, and I was so happy that I got to see that show. I've gotta do stuff like this more often!

After the show we took the looooong ride on the Orange Line back to Ilsan. Thankfully we each have our iPods to keep us occupied and entertained! (And hey, tonight was also my first night *not* spent at Michael's since....I can't even remember!)

Day 385: Exhausted!

The personalities of each of my kids slowly becomes a little more revealed each day that I spend with them. They're not just 12 pairs of black eyes staring at me, they're starting to become 12 cute little individuals with their own little quirks and needs. Gotta love 'em for it.

Danny knows the most English and can actually speak in small sentences already.

Ariel can't speak a damn word of English - at all - and has been silent the whole time.

Judy is as good as gold and sits quietly waiting for my next command.

Roy speaks Korean constantly and can't seem to sit still in his chair.

Paul is emotional for the first block in the morning cause he misses his mom and often cries, but is all smiles and laughter by the time second block rolls around.

Justin is the cutest little boy you can imagine and I can tell already he's going to be my favourite.

Nicole - just like her older sister Joanne who I used to teach in Grade 2 - is shy at first but is slowly warming up to me, and has the same nervous smile as her sister.

Laney's gonna be the princess - and always has perfect hair.

Eric is the class translator and translates other kids' Korean for me when they don't know the words in English.

Ryan is cute but also rather stern for a five-year old, and always answers "yes" to every single question in such a matter-of-fact, near-authoritarian manner, even if it's not a "yes or not" question.

Jeanie (who, also like Roy,) seems to have to use the bathroom a lot, and also speak too much Korean in class.

And then there's Colin...

Colin actually has the greatest command of English in the class, or at least he talks the most. He's cute, but certainly precocious and high-maintenance. He demands constant attention and reassurance. And he certainly has high expectations of us teachers! Sonya forgot to close his backpack in first block and he was mad at her for the rest of the day. He kept saying "I don't like Sonya Teacher! Sonya Teacher bag close no!" He was so put out by it and had this little angry face it was so hard not to laugh. Sonya eventually had to make this big formal apology to him and then he was okay with her.

During second or third block I walked in though, and he looked like he was about to cry. I went over to him to ask what was wrong and he looked at me with these big, sad eyes and said "Teacher...I'm ugly!" Honestly, it nearly broke my heart! Where did he learn that word from? Who said it to him? Where did this come from all of a sudden? I consoled him and gave him a big hug and told him how handsome he was and that seemed to help. But seriously, you should've seen his face - it was *so* sad! I can tell that Colin is probably going to be the source of most of my stories this year.

By the time the day ended I was so completely exhausted! My afternoon classes have been really draining as well, and things have just been so chaotic in the school. It seems I ended up with a lot of lower level classes this year and makes things a lot more challenging for teaching. No more cake-walk easy-breezy schedule for me, I guess. Time to buckle up and show what I can do with these kids. But all I can think of, is where the hell am I going to get all the energy needed for this? 12-hour sleeps at night? Mid-afternoon naps? 20 cups of coffee a day spiked with RedBull? Cocaine, every hour on the hour? (kidding!) ;-)

Day 384: A Rough Day

Today was a bit of a rough day. Looks like yesterday's 'First Day' charm has worn off a little. Not that my kids aren't as cute as can be, but it's just setting in now how much work this is going to be. I'm starting off from scratch here! These kids don't know anything! No one's peed their pants (yet?), but it's still really exhausting.

There's no routine at all right now and that's key to stability and control. But that just comes in time. I'm still working on basic classroom rules and behaviour, and of course making sure they always know where the bathroom is. We definitely need practice with our line-up techniques though, as some of the smaller ones tend to wander off when we're in the hall it seems...

The hardest part today was Computer and Gym class, which normally are two no-brainers and once were very relaxing times for the teacher. The kids went wild in each class cause they were so excited about it, and it was an effort to keep things under control. It's hard to do with five year olds who speak English, never mind ones that don't know what "sit down" or "be quiet" or "don't eat the headphones" means! LOL

Still, it's slowly coming together. Patience, repetition, and consistency are the key right now to establishing a good teacher-student relationship, and getting them into a good routine. Man, this job sure tests your patience abilities. I've churned out patience in this job like I never thought was humanly possible for myself. Forget culture shock from moving to a foreign country, working with very young children has been my biggest character test yet! Haha!

After a messy morning filled with more chaos than I'm used to, I was so happy to see the little ones go home. Man, do *I* ever need a nap!!! ;-p

Day 383: The First Day

So today is March 2nd, and the it's the First Day of the new school year here in Korea. I get 12 new Parrots all to myself, and I couldn't be more...nervous!

I know it sounds strange, but I'm totally nervous for today. I'm nervous that all my kids won't like me, or that I'll have 12 little hellions, or that I'll have nightmare moms, or that they won't listen to me, or that not a single one of them will speak English and they'll all be crying and peeing their pants on Day 1, and therefore everyday after. Haha!

But honestly though, as exaggerated as all of that may sound, to varying degrees they're all truths. It's funny to think that me, THE TEACHER, is nervous! All through my school years I was always nervous on the first day back to school, and I never once thought that my teachers might be nervous too. Now I'm on the other side of that coin and I know how it feels. My coworkers feel the same so at least I know I'm not alone with this feeling. I have to keep reminding myself, they're *only * five-year olds! I mean, come on! Who's in charge here, really?

And overall the day went pretty well. The first thing I noticed was how SMALL all of them were. I was used to the old Parrots, and all I can say is man, kids sure do grow fast in a year! They were all very quiet and shy and wide-eyed, just staring at me the whole time. The good thing is that most of them speak a few words, and there's a couple that actually speak quite a bit of English. Thank heavens!

Still, it was back to the basics. Basic classroom vocabulary, a tour of the school, showing them where their books and own individual little shelves were, practicing 'Stand Up/Sit Down' and other listening to the teacher exercises were all introduced, but not until after the very important lesson in where the bathroom was, and how to ask to go there. Gotta get that one down ASAP!

It was a kinda fun day and the kids were adorable. Still, I was freaking exhausted by the end of it! It should be a fun school year with Justin, Judy, Ryan, Paul, Eric, Laney, Nicole, Roy, Danny, Colin, Jeanie, and Ariel! Stay tuned for more adventures of 'Scotty & The Parrots: Season 2!'

Day 382: Welcome To SimCity

No work today! It's Tuesday, and another random Korean national holiday thrown into mid-week! Gotta love 'em, eh? ;-)

Today is Indepence Movement Day, and celebrates when the Koreans rose up against Japanese occupation and caused a big ruckus cause they were tired of being oppressed and marginalized on their own homelands. I spent the day relaxing with my friends here in Ilsan.

I went to LaFesta to meet up with Addie & Katie and we did some CD shopping (I finally got my hands on the new Michael Buble CD!) and then had coffee at Starbucks. After that we went for a really nice walk around Lake Park. Lake Park is a very large park (well, at least large by Asian standards) at the southern boundary of Ilsan and has a good sized man-made lake in the middle. It's probably the nicest park I've seen in Korea, and Ilsan's actually a little bit famous for it.

It's quite pretty, but like most of these new master-planned instant 'just add concrete' satellite cities, has a very artificial feel to it. Living in Ilsan actually feels a lot like living in SimCity. The same chains of stores can be seen on every single corner, and the landscape is covered in rows up on rows of identical high-rise apartment towers. It was like a giant just swept in, clicked the mouse and draaaaaged it across the landscape. Boom! Instant community for half a million people, all living in buildings that come in only one of three or five styles and colours. Uh-oh! The citizens are demanding a park! We better build one! Plop! Down comes Lake Park, with its perfect winding pathways, neat and clean gardens, tasteful public art placed here and there, and requisite children's playgrounds every few hundred metres, and there you have it. Clean and organized and pretty, yet sterile, synthetic, and lacking in anything original, 'organic', or soulful. Just the way the Koreans like it.

As an urban planning junkie, life here in this massive come-to-life computer game is very surreal at times. And you really do have to see it to believe it. Hmmm...I should take some pictures to show you guys. It's certainly unlike anything we have back in North America. The SimCity creators would have a field day here!

Day 381: Meet The Parents

So today was Meet The Parents Day at POLY, or I guess for all the parents, it would be Meet The Teacher Day! All of the parents of the new Preschoolers were coming down for a little presentation from our Director, and would then have the chance to check out their child's new classroom - and me. It was a little nerve-racking as I wasn't exactly prepared for it, and didn't know what to expect.

It actually went really well. First during the assembly in the library they brought all of us teachers up on stage to introduce us to all the parents, and that was a little weird to have all these EYES staring at you. Chang was speaking completely in Korean and the only thing we recognized was when he said our names. It was sorta like being up on display, like we were up for auction, only the classroom decisions had already been made. The kids who've been slated to be in the Parrots class are already mine, no turning back now!

After the presentation everybody went into their respective classrooms. All the parents of the new crop of Parrots came in and I got to (briefly) meet all 12 of my new kids. I have seven boys and five girls, and they're all absolutely adorable - and so tiny!! I realized how much my kids had grown in the eight months I had been their teacher. This new batch looked so scared and so small in comparsion...

All of the parents seemed really nice (shy as usual) but a few of them talked to me. Sonya is my new Korean co-teacher and she's awesome. I think it's gonna be a great year. We'll see how things go on Day 1 of the new school year which begins on Wednesday!

Day 380: Boys & Their Toys

Now I know that all of you know that I'm *not* an electronic gadget kinda guy. At all. Computers frustrate me, digital cameras scare me, palm pilots bore me, and cell phones...are necessary. A lot of foreigners come to Korea and go ga-ga over all the toys that you can buy here. And with our healthy incomes you can basically buy any kind of electronic toy that you could want. Addie alone has bought a brand new Apple I-book and GameBoy Advance in the last two months. But I've always steered clear of that, preferring to spend my hard-earned cash on travel, paying off debts, and buying endless CD's.

Well today that changed...I bought my first electronic gadget today. Yes, I succumbed!

And I bought an iPod mini! Can you believe it? Trust me, I'm as shocked as you are!

Addie and Peter both have them at work, and they are awfully pretty to look at and so idiot-proof easy to use that even I can master them without any stress. And then two weeks ago Michael bought one too... Well apparently there was a sale on, and when I saw the price for one, I just couldn't say no. I bought a brand-new beautiful blue iPod mini - capable of holding 1000 songs - for only 225,000 Won! (about $250 Cdn.) Not a bad deal at all! I bought it online on some Korean website that's popular for electronics shopping, thanks to the linguistic skills of Young-Seok who did all the ordering for me. It'll be delivered to POLY in a week or so and I can't wait.

I love music like you can't believe, and the idea of having 1000 of my very favourite songs at my fingertips leaves me quivering and salivating at the thought! I just know that once I have it it's gonna be permanately attached to my ears. Maybe this is the start of a new personal revolution?

Day 379: Movin' Out

I slept in this morning and then went over to Addie's place to help her move. Addie's moving into a new apartment, but it certainly isn't a far move. In fact, it's just across the hall from her old place! Sally & Jay's last day was last week and so their big giant apartment came available. Addie jumped on the chance to move out of 'The Triangle' that is her tiny apartment, and I said I'd help her out. With just the moving of a few key pieces of personal furniture, it was done before you know it. Our apartments come furnished so nothing major like fridges or beds had to be moved.

It's funny cause between Addie, Katie, and myself, we've all each lived in two different apartments while here in Korea. And all for very different reasons, too. This is unusual cause most foreigners live in only one place for their year in Korea. Few rarely get the opportunity/need the reason to move. I guess us three are exceptions to the rule.

It's weird to see Addie's personal stuff in Sally & Jay's place. I spent a lot of time over there, namely with watching Survivor and The Apprentice every night. And now it's Addie's. It looks the same...sorta...but everything's re-arranged and the decorations have changed. It was sorta like when I moved into Brad's place, and then transformed it to make it my own. Life here is often like being on a TV show. The show and the setting stays the same, but the characters come and go on the same sets. Sorta like when Rachel & Monica traded apartments with Joey & Chandler, our TV show also likes to please the viewers by staying on familiar turf. Just think - in a few months my time on the show will be finished, and a new actor will replace me and move into my apartment. Oh, if these walls could talk, all the English Teacher stories they'd tell!

Day 378: Cleaning House

This morning was a fairly relaxed one. No classes to teach at all, and not even much prep it seemed. We had a meeting about the new schedule for next year, and then it was our chance to do some major spring cleaning. All our old books we got rid of, all our desks were cleaned out, old reports and tests and other paper crap we don't need were recycled, pictures and name tags of the kids taken down, old student artwork, it all got torn down. Our Korean teachers tore apart all the classrooms and redecorated them for the new kids coming in. Wow - so much change!

On top of that we made some final changes to our new afternoon schedules too. Mine turned out to be 'just alright.' I really wanted to be able to follow my kids up to the next grade but I guess it didn't work out that way. I'll be teaching some of my same students in a few of the classes, but not many. My new schedule looks like this:

Monday - Wednesday - Friday:

Grade 2, Level 1 & 3
Grade 3, Level 4 & 5
Grade 6, Level 1 & 3

Tuesday - Thursday:

Grade 1 Specials Science, Level 4 & 5
Grade 4 Non-Returnee, Level 3 & 4

Man, that means a whole lot of new names I'll have to learn again! Should be fun!

Day 377: Caps 'n Gowns and Movie Stars

Today was Graduation Day - for the Kindergarteners, that is!

Graduating from Kindergarten is a really big deal in Korea. Much bigger than home. Big enough that it warrants a full-morning ceremony complete with caps and gowns and speeches and everything. Our ceremony was held in a reception hall of a church basement and us Preschool teachers went along to help make sure that everything went smoothly.

The kids were excited as hell and all wired up. Soon their parents arrived and the ceremony began. A few speeches and welcome messages were made, and then each kid was called up on stage individually to receive their little Kindergarten diploma. It was kinda chaotic nonetheless though cause most of the parents don't understand much English so they weren't even listening to anything. Instead, they were all just chatting to each other and pushing in and out of the kids to take photos of their own child. This was quite unlike any graduation ceremony back home where this behaviour would be considered extremely rude and disruptive, but then again, I'm not at home, am I?

Also, all the Korean teachers were up in a fuss because a fairly famous movie star was at our graduation ceremony. I don't remember his name but he's been in quite a few movies, and even just *looks* like a movie star. He has two daughters who go to POLY and one of them was graduating today so that's why he was there. After the ceremony all the Korean teachers were fluttering around and giddy as hell when they got to have their pictures taken with him. It was funny to watch and kinda weird because they were all so excited, yet I don't recognize him at all. Fame is a strange and relative thing, isn't it? It was cool though and our POLY campus is even a little bit famous because of his kids' enrollment at our school. Does that mean I'm a little bit famous cause I teach at the school where the kids of a famous movie star attend? (probably not!)

Day 376: An Icy Ride

Today was my last day with the Parrots! *sniff sniff*

Kindergarten doesn't begin until next Wednesday but the teachers all need time to prepare for the new school year. It was weird being in the classroom with the kids knowing that today was going to be the last time that they'd all be mine. Next time I saw them they'd be all split up into different classes with new teachers. It was kinda sad actually. I've grown really attached to these kids and really do love them. After being their teacher for almost eight months I feel like I've really bonded with them. Oh well, I'll miss them but at least I'll still get to see them around the school. Don't forget me, Parrots!

After work today I had a very scary ride home. Peter was coming over again to take another look at my computer (the technical difficulties just keep on going...) We were both leaving work at the same time and since he was heading straight to my place he offered to give me a ride home on his motorbike.

I hesitated a long time and wasn't too sure about it. It would certainly be faster, but I'm scared of motorbikes (even though I've ridden on Chris' before) and plus it was really cold outside. A ride home on the back of one of those things must be awfully chilly. Well Peter convined me to hop on and just hold on tight cause we'd be home that much faster.

So there I was again, somehow I managed to get myself onto one of those crazy machines and we were flying through the streets of Ilsan. And once again I didn't have a helmet and all I could think about was how icy the roads were cause of the weather and that this machine was just a death trap waiting to happen. No accidents took place, but it was goddamn freezing!!! I tried to hide my face behind his helmet as we rode along cause I swear that my face had frozen and that icy chunks of it were breaking off and flying onto the road. It was that bloody cold!!

We made it home safe and sound and it did take me a few minutes to thaw my face back to life again, but it was thrilling nonetheless. (I just prefer summer time when it comes to riding dangerously along on a bike through the mayhem-filled streets of Korea!)

Day 375: Snow!

I left my apartment this morning to meet up with the girls to walk to school and was greeted with a wonderful sight. It had snowed overnight and Korea had been turned into a beautiful winter wonderland! Wow! I was SO excited about it! I ran back inside to get my camera and then raced back outside! Me and the girls were giddy as hell about it and frolicked around in the snow being completely silly and taking tons of photos.

And it was nice snow! It was white and soft and fluffy and covered everything in a still and silent blanket - not dirty or slushy or anything gross like that. For once Jungsan actually looked *clean!* The world looked so innocent and pretty again, like my childhood years back in Thunder Bay. I don't know what it is but the world just seems so much *quieter* after freshly fallen snow. No honking horns, no screaming children - just white silent bliss. What a rare treat!

I just *had* to walk to work today. There was no way I could pass up an opportunity like this by taking the bus or a cab. Addie and Kara didn't want to get wet so they opted out, but Katie and I gave in to our childish impulses and horsed around in the snow all the way to work. It was awesome, even though I knew it would not last.

By the time we got off of work the snow had already melted. Korea's first snowfall had come and gone already. Ahhh well, it was fun while it lasted. :-)

Day 374: Potty Mouth

I tend to have a bit of a potty mouth. Well, at least here in my blog. I really can't help myself - sometimes it's just that the most appropriate word to capture a particular emotion just happens to be a four-letter word! Well for all of you who enjoy swearing now and then, or just saying dirty or offensive or inappropriate things, raise your hand (*my hand goes up) and read on. Here's how to say some less-than-pleasant but more-than-fun things in Korean!

"Fuck!" ---> 'sheebahl!'

"You're lower than an insect!" ---> 'berrle-mahn-daw mawtahn sakkee!'

"I'll kick your penis!" ---> 'jawt-kkah!'

"I'm totally wasted!" ---> 'nah wahn-jernee gahsser!'

"Son of a bitch!" ---> 'ga sakkee!'

"You look like a penis!" ---> 'jawt-kkaht-ohn nawm!'

"Go drink your mother's breast milk and then come back!" ---> 'gahser erm-mah jerf-eenah der merk-kkaw wah!'

"Go home and masturbate!" ---> 'jeebe gahser ttahl-ttahr-eenah cher!'

"Oh, shit smell!" ---> 'ahh, nerjer-boon-hahn sakkee!'

"Do you wanna come to my place?" ---> 'ooree jeeboh-raw gahllayo?'

"Let's sleep together!" ---> 'katshee jahp she ga!'

"Is this your first time?" ---> 'neo cher-ohmeeyah?'

"I'm still a virgin." ---> 'nah ahjeek chawng-gah-geeyah.'

"I'm frightened." ---> 'nooserwo.'

"Don't worry. I'll be careful." ---> 'gerk-jjerng-hahjee mah. jaw-seem-hahlkke.'

"Touch me!" ---> 'nah mahnjer jwo!'

"Bite me!" ---> 'kka-moorer jwo!'

"I love you, but I can't become your husband." ---> 'nerl sahrahng-hahjee-mahn, nee nahm-pyawnohn.'

"I'm crazy about you!" ---> 'nahn nergah jaw-ah meechee-gesser!'

"Get lost!" ---> 'kkerjer!'

By the way, I don't actually know how to say these on my own (with the exception of a few.) I'm getting them from a great book entitled "Making Out In Korean", so if there's anything else you want to know, just ask! ;-)