Day 284: You Know You've Been...

In Korea for a long time (maybe too long?) when:

- you're peeing in a men's room and are pretty much in full view of random passerby, and don't even care.

- you crave kimchi at random moments, and find it odd when a meal doesn't come with it.

- you get in an uproar for having to pay the equivalent of $1.50 for a two-hour subway ride and scream out at the absurdity of the cost, and how mad you are about when they raised transit fares

- you think nothing about spending eight dollars on a tiny block of cheese

- you start to sing along with the Korean commercials

- you forget your hand phone at home and feel naked and empty and vulnerable and lonely and scared without it, and feel like *everyone* is staring at you in pity/condescension

- when you'll go to the movie theatre to see just about anything, or will watch the worst television programs ever, just because they're in English

- when you can stand and maintain a conversation/balance/your fragile composure on the bus while it hurtles down the street dodging other traffic at 92 km./hour

- when someone asks how old you are, and you ask them without even thinking "Western or Korean years?"

- when you can navigate your way home on the crazy subway network while completely shittered and make it home without any difficulty

- you know the best areas in the city to meet other cool foreigners

- you know the best areas in the city to hide from annoying foreigners

- walking down the street and upon seeing more than three foreigners in a gaggle you stop and stare just like the Koreans

- you are excited about having a Starbucks coffee, when you formerly loathed it/made fun of people who went there

- you can't imagine how you lasted so long in life without heated floors

- you get excited to go for a car ride, and then are terrified of the traffic and driving habits of the Koreans and vow never to get into a vehicle again

- you spend an afternoon in Insadong or at a palace and feel neglected because you didn't have at least three separate groups of Korean high schoolers asking for an interview on 'what you think about Korea, and whether or not you like kimchi'

- you get into deep intense many-hour long debates about who makes better chicken - BBQ or Kyochon?

- your pizza comes with corn or potatoes on it and you don't even notice anymore

- when you start using Konglish in your own personal vernacular

- you consider buying for yourself a Burberry scarf