Day 186: A Rude Awakening

At about 6 o'clock in the morning today (well, I guess technically tomorrow since it was after midnight and therefore Wednesday) I woke up to hear the sound of yelling and crashing below. Awaking from my sleepy fog, I wasn't sure if it was just a bad dream and I was imagining things, or if it was something else.... I listened for a minute and then heard a HUGE SMASH coming from right below my apartment window... I looked down into the space between my apartment building and the next one and saw something smashed all over the pavement and just got a glimpse of a man disappearing behind the corner. This was immediately followed by more screams from a female below.

I knew exactly what was going on.

In my building live a young Korean couple who hate each other more than I ever thought was humanly possible. And they seem to enjoy announcing their extreme marital stresses out to the entire neighbourhood. The worst domestic fighting that I have ever heard in my entire life comes from them, and sadly, this happens on a fairly regular basis. It's always at some ungodly hour of the night (or really early morning in this case) and often lasts for hours on end. It had actually been a while since I had heard them do this but this one was particularly bad.

Even though they live two floors below me, their yelling and screaming at each other is so loud that you swear they're right outside your doorway. And it's more than just yelling - it almost always involves stuff being thrown around and objects/appliances/household items being smashed against walls and the floor. And tonight, for the first time, this was extended to outside their apartment. I remember one time sleeping over at Brad's place back in the day and because I was sleeping on the floor I could actually feel *vibrations and shudders* from their fighting two floors below. I don't think they're hitting each other, cause they never appear injured, but rather just destroying their apartment.

This has, unsurprisingly, caused great stress on all the tenants in the building. My building manager has asked them numerous times to either stop it or move out, but they absolutely refuse to. In actuality 90% of the yelling and screaming is coming from HER and she seems like the biggest bitch of the century. She keeps threatening to sue the building manager if she makes her leave (I guess this can be done in Korea?) and continues with the angry fits. The bdg mgr even had everybody in the building sign a petition asking them to leave but it's been to no avail. The police have been called in before, but there's apparently nothing they can do either. We're literally stuck with them and can't make them leave.

Sadly, domestic violence is fairly common in Korea, and almost accepted as 'daily life.' Nobody blinks an eye to see a husband reaming out his wife on the street in public, and I've even heard of stories from friends who've actually witnessed women being BEATEN by their husbands in public. The strangest part about this is that the women actually accept it for the most part and never try to fight back. In times when someone (either a local or most often a foreigner) tries to intervene and stop the husband's violence, the wife ALWAYS runs up to the defense of her husband (even though he was just kicking the shit out of her) and actually will turn on the person trying to help out. It's completely fucked up, but I guess us Westerners have a very different view on what's appropriate in terms of domestic violence and male-female relationships.

I feel so sorry for the husband in my building who is stuck living with this psycho bitch. Apparently he wants a divorce but she won't let him leave. And a number of times, when coming home from work or being out at the bar or wherever, you can see him sitting outside the apartment resting and 'preparing' himself before diving back into the hellhole that is his apartment. As mentioned before, domestic violence happens more often than you'd think here in Korea, but this particular couple are SO BAD that even all my Korean neighbours can't stand it anymore.

It's absolutely horrible to hear and some nights I'm actually afraid for someone's safety. My neighbourhood is normally so quiet and so happy and so peaceful, until this fury is unleashed now and then. I can't believe that two people would continue to live like this night after night. And I can't believe that vocally and psychologically berating your husband is allowed by the authorities, as is a man beating his wife repeatedly in public. It's just one of those things that I'll never understand, nor do I really want to.